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Just pimping my latest project: PHN's foray into directorial work!

[link]

Check  out what it takes to put together a custom vehicle for the biggest automotive aftermarket show in the US: SEMA! Watch as people talk about things that PHN doesn't understand! See a car go vrroom vroom!
On top of the [link] Vectronstudios [link] site, I've started a new blog:

[link]

I encourage everyone who enjoys my work to take a look, as it will become my preferred method of uploading/updating. I'll always update the blog first, and it will have a lot of fun stuff on it, like videos of my work, commentary, and so on. Once again, the blog is at:

[link]

Thanks for checking me out!
Vectronstudios!!!!
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Paypal links (for me at least) now up and operational! Now you can get those prints you've had your eye on. In the famous merchant words from Zelda 1:

"BUY SOMETHIN WILL YA!"
To everyone who stopped by at Anime Expo, thanks a million! I'm proud to provide the link to the new studio site:

VectronStudios!
[link]

Here, you can buy prints and stuff of all the goodies that we had @ the Artist Alley, as well as any other new works that are made! Take a look, and keep it real!
ANIME EXPO,

HERE
WE
GO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I'm gonna be in Artist Alley fo sho. Got a strong following, with special guest stars:

:iconwynahiros:
:iconfamira:
:iconkirkis9:

Check them out, and then come see us all IN STEREO at Anime Expo 2006, BITCHES.
--News--
Werk werk werk.....In other news I don't have cancer anymore. It uh....went away. Thanks to everyone who sent their well wishes and fuck everyone who didn't send money or anything.


--Future Con Appearances--
Anime Expo 2006

--Commissions are now OPEN--
Fee's are negotiable. Averaging from $15 and up for pencils. Additional costs for inks and colors. Further costs for purchasing the original linework and buyer handles all shipping.

--Art trades and Collaborations--
Note me.

--Kiribans--
Still no.

--Website--
www.demonlab.net

And that's how we do.
--News--
TBA


--Future Con Appearances--
TBA

--Commissions are now OPEN--
Fee's are negotiable. Averaging from $15 and up for pencils. Additional costs for inks and colors. Further costs for purchasing the original linework and buyer handles all shipping.

--Art trades and Collaborations--
Open...to possibilities.

--Kiribans--
Ha ha no.

--Website--
www.demonlab.net

And that's how we do.
When people ask me to look at their galleries, I usually look at the front page, and if I'm not immediately blown away, or if it doesn't load in 2 seconds, I usually just paste these all purpose responses into the first picture I see:

"Now, this is only my opinion, and you can disagree with it if you like, but that is the ugliest shit I've ever seen."

"Your art is really good for your age. I expect big things of you when you continue evolving outside of grade school."

"I'd love to go into critiquing this further, but I've just seen some really awful art and I've become blind."

"This reminds me of an episode of Saved by the Bell, when Zack and the gang get into some pretty wild hijinx."

"Hey dude/dudette! Great pic/poem/photo! You've got real good stuff! I hope that your pics/poems/photos keep improving! Peace out man/girl!"


All Purpose AIM responses:

Scrub: Omg how do u color like that?
Me: Fuck, I just cut off my thumb. BBl.

Moron: Can you draw some backgrounds for my comics?
Me: Fuck, my kids just died. BBl.

Dipshit: Does this count as an art trade? (gives me picture I never wanted)
Me: No.
Deviant Art notice? As if the ads weren't enough. I talk a lot of shit about DA, and it's fucked up-ness, but this is seriously too much.

Btw, subscribers. You might NOT have noticed that in uploading files, you get a new little "option" to make your submission a "print." What they barely mention, however, is that you get 10% of the proceeds from your art. The other 90%?

DA pockets it.

Best of all, you know how on all of your submission info, "No" is on the left, and "Yes" is on the right? With this new "option" that you can't turn off, it's switched around. So after hitting "Yes" 40 times to upload something, you might just "accidentally" let DA sell your artwork for 90%. Yay for DA. You rock.

It's all becomming clear now, why non-subscribers get the shaft. It's so you subscribe out of sheer frustration and get shafted again. Great job, DA. Keep fucking people up.

Cool List:
:iconteh-dave: :iconwynahiros: :iconfamira:
MastaFuu is back from his Two Week Ban for exceeding the Awesome limit. More information at 6.
WHOEVER GETS THE 13,000 HIT GETS A FREE COMMISSION

CONTEST RESULTSEVERYONE LOSES

These were seriously the most godawful entries I've ever had the misfortune of looking at.

EVERYONE WHO ENTERED SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF THEMSELVES.

Maybe next contest, but I sincerely doubt there will be another at this point. I mean, MY GOD. The crap I had to put up with. IF YOU THINK I'M TALKING ABOUT YOUR ENTRY I PROBABLY AM.

THE MASTA LJ
Is right here: [link]

Current number of Dev Violations: 39

Other Info:
COMMISSIONS: Contact me for Commission info.
ART TRADE STATUS
1.>empty<
2.>empty<
3.>empty<
Current number of Dev Violations: 39


THE MASTA CONTEST

>UPDATE<
POST AN ENTRY IN THE THINGY BELOW THERE, THE HIT BOX THING TO LET ME KNOW YOU'RE ENTERING


Everyone loves Masta Fuu. If you don't, well, you probably have something fucking wrong with you. But how much do you love Teh Fuu? This contest is a good way to find out how...

Yuu Fuck Fuu is the name of this foray. Take anything from my (FFY images do NOT apply) archive, and let it inspire you to make a picture!

Draw Jimmy McPerson keeping freedom intact! Make a funny image of Walt Whitman angsting over his LJ! JESUS TRAVELING BACK IN TIME! Or, how about one of my art pieces? Try to FUCK FUU!

The funniest, best drawn, or all around greatest entry gets a free commission! How sweet is that? PRETTY DAMN SWEET I THINK.

Entries are due in...lesse...it's gonna be May soon...so May 31st.

DO NOT POST IN THIS ENTRY TO ENTER THE CONTEST. ONLY POST IN THIS ENTRY TO REAPPLY ON THE FFY LIST


THE MASTA LJ
I'll bite the bullet and make an LJ. In it, I will post many a humourous anecdotes that I cannot on DA, because I will just cause controversy and possibly more deletions. So go to
[link] and like, wait for me to update.

Info:
Commissions: Contact me for Commission info.
Art Trades: I'll do it if you tickle my fancy. You wanna touch me? Go ahead...touch me. Oh yeah...
ART TRADE STATUS
1.>empty<
2.>empty<
3.>empty<

Fuu Fucks Yuu: I go into your archive and I edit a picture. IT'S FUCKING FUNNY. I swear to God.

FUU FUCKS YUU is a program in which I get permission from the artist to obtain an image from their archive, and then photoMANIPULATE it in a humorous manner. People who post in this journal entry give me official permission and waive all copyright to me and can therefore not complain when the image arises again in my archive.

So when DA deletes the next one, everyone will know how stupid they are.

>NOTE<
POST IN THIS JOURNAL ENTRY TO APPLY ON THE FFY LIST.
You know what cheeses me off?

Commercials that don't advertise anything new:  I hate seeing Gatorade commercials that advertise guess what? Gatorade. Not a new flavor, not a new spinoff drink; just people running and sweating colored sweat. WE KNOW GATORADE EXISTS. Isn't that what commercials are for? To let people know a product is out there? You can't GO to a gym with having 10 Gatorade machines humming nearby ( I like the hum, actually, when I'm weight lifting. Makes me feel athletic). But still; advertise a lower price, a new flavor. Fast food restaurants advertise new burgers, videogame and toy companies advertise new releases. BUT WE KNOW GATORADE EXISTS. If you are going to release a new commercial about the same product, at least make it funny; something worth watching. Like those Washington Mutual commercials (those are a hoot). But don't try to be funny when the core joke wasn't funny to begin with (Geico. The joke is dead.)

Caramel. I hate Caramel. Well, I hate the super sticky kind. I like the smooth, thinner kind that you have in Snicker bars and Whatchamacallits (actual name). But I hate the super thick kind that are in See's Candies. That, is so....sick. And those solid caramel candies. Dear GOD HOW CAN PEOPLE EAT THAT!? It's so nasty...all sticky between your teeth...it's like eating sweetened glue...toffee's are ok I guess...but Caramel. UGH.

See's Candies. Those things are fucking disgusting. The filling in them is usually this unidentifiable filling of a super sticky and yucky nature. Maybe I'm spoiled by simpler chocolates full of preservatives; Crunch bars, Krackels, Mr. Goodbars (my favorite). See's chocolate isn't so bad, but it's the filling they put in that is just nasty...Parallel, I hate people who give See's chocolate for CHRISTMAS GIFTS.
JESUS! It's the thought that counts, but someone who gives the world's nastiest chocolate as a gift isn't thinking very much. You know what's a good candy gift? Ferroro-Rocher. Oh man, those are chocolate orgasms.

Furries. Everyone knows how much I hate furries. I really don't care for them personally...they were probably abused as children, which gave them such a WARPED VIEW ON REALITY, but what pisses me off so much about them is...that...uh....they're stupid. Yeah.

Cilantro. So gross...0 nutritional value, and it has that nasty stem that throws off the groove of the meal. Cilantro, Parsley, all those "dresser" vegetables that are supposed to make the meal nicer. Just gross, leave that crap off my pasta thank you.

Reality Shows: These are such crap. Has anyone noticed the shows are steadily growing worse? More and more depraved: people getting married to random people; people getting plastic surgery; marrying midgets. So terrible....American Idol is the biggest hunk of crap ever. THEY DON'T WRITE THEIR OWN SONGS FOR CHRISSAKES. All they do is look pretty and sing harmoniously. Give me original songs that rock out loud anyday over some 19 year old MANGLING Aretha Franklin's best.

Mary Kate and Ashley Olsen: These two young girls have so much money and they don't deserve a damn cent of it. All they deserve is what they made on Full House, because that was the only time that actually worked on anything that was worth watching. Otherwise, they make crappy movies that are sent straight to video, sell clothes made in 3rd world countries (like in Vietnam....::cough cough::), and young, brainless girls buy them. WHY. WHY I ASK. My little sister, as much as I love her (blood is blood), is so, freakin', stupid. She says "I like them" as a reason? THAT'S NOT A REASON!!! Curse you, Mary Kate and Ashley Inc; a bunch of old ass CEOs who are manipulating these two girls and making them icons so that stupid, younger girls hold them as false idols. WHY DOESN'T GOD STRIKE DOWN THESE TWO CALFS. Or at least Martha Stewart them...
Same with Paris Hilton.

Things I like:

Girls kissing. Oh yeah...this is so hot. But not like, ugly chicks. Hot chicks. I've yet to see this outside of a porno, but I hold fast that I will before I die.

The Practice: Oh man, this show is so awesome. I love it so much. It's a lawyer show that's got superb actors and hardcore drama. I've actually told telemarketers to "OBJECTION: WHAT IS THE RELEVANCE OF THIS INQUIRY!?" when they call me during the Practice. No one bothers me when I watch, or else I throw legal terms at them like "REASONABLE DOUBT."

When jerks get theirs: Come on...who doesn't like this? When someone you absolutely hate falls down, or hurts themself, or just flat out gets fucked up. Love thy Neighbors and thine Enemies; that's an ideal that Jesus taught. And it's a great idea. The world would be a better place if we all did that.
But I still love it...

Chicken: I love chicken so much...I actually prefer it to beef. I love the flavor, the texture. I love it fried, boiled, chopped, dipped in Teriyaki. Everything may taste like chicken, but nothing beats the real thing. Anyone ever go to KFCruelty.com? Funniest site ever. I don't want chickens abused...no....but the way I prefer them to end up, does that really make my opinion on chicken abuse valid?

4 Day Weekends: Sure, it's just an extra day, but there's something nice about not having to do something you're supposed to for just one day...

Fans: I love my fans; I love when they IM me and talk. I don't like it when they try to trick me into doing a free commission...but I don't mind if they wanna art trade or nothing like that...::hint hint::
I've been waiting for like...3 days for my counter to hit 6666. And it finally does.

2 MINUTES LATER ITS 6667.

Thanks, DOUCHEBAG.
Hi mastafuu,
You have 6,599 pageviews total and your 65 deviations were viewed 2,858 times, with 3,835 fullviews, for a grand total of 6,693 views.
Overall, people left 263 comments and added your deviations to their favourites 79 times.
Your most commented deviation was CB WIP with 18 comments, receiving an average of 1.14 per day,, while your most favourited one was Term Paper, with 12 favourites, averaging 0.31 per day.


3 Favourites were given for every 10 Comments.


Every 0.4 days you upload a new deviation, and it's usually on a Friday, with 75% (49 ) of your deviations.


Your favorite time of the day to upload is at 18pm with 25 deviations and your busiest month was March 2004 with 64 (98%) deviations.


The majority of your deviations are uploaded to the Digitalart gallery (54), while your favorite category in it was Drawings with 50 deviations


Comments per deviation: 4.04
Favourites per deviation: 1.21
Views per deviation: 102.96
Comments per day: 9.74
Favourites per day: 2.92
Views per day: 247.88
Pageviews per day: 244.4


NOW LET'S TRASH THIS PLACE
Everyone loves my old essays...but the art goes unloved...

:^(
Alright, in the coming days, I'm going to release a 12 page comic. It's going to be based on my "Megaman" saga. If you don't want to be totally lost, browse to the beginning of my archive, and you'll some fairly primitive CGs from waaay back when. Among them, you will see MastaFuu's Megaman. Read the descriptions to follow the story.

The comic takes place after the fight with Shademan, but before the fight with Knightman.

Fuu out.
My outfit's so RI-DIC-U-LOUS
In the club looking so CON-SPIC-U-OUS

Back in the game, drawing like a Fuu
The Cibby to dizzy ain't e-nuff for my crew

So one, in comes the two, to the three, to the four
Maybe my fans want more? Why that?
Could it be because my art's hard-CORE?

Iono, I just do all the shit, flip the switch
Not obeying any they laws so the fags go snitch
Deviant Violations all over this bitch

But it's aiite, ain't lookin' for a fight
Unless you find me on the wrong night
Me an Arthole, quite a sight
Doing shit in one hour you'd wait your whole life

To do, but don't worry about me and mine
Because I'm doing just fine, working on so much art
that anything less should be a crime

I'm tearing down borders, bringing down walls
I'll do whatever I want, utter my anything through my lips
Even if it's a misunderstood manimal named Zebrix:

Fucking a mule on a ship drinking alcohol on Ramadan while taking a dump on the Koran while flipping off Islam eating steak with Osama and reading porno with Saddam

No mod can control my rhymes, no punk can control my flow
My lyrics are fresh, my homage is crunk
I make catch-phrases faster than you can say:

"Oh Fo Sho?"

I'm typing this as fast as I can, as fast as they come
So have a seat, sit down, shut up and have some fun
Know your place, don't burn your bra like a fembitch
Get in that kitchen and make me a sandwich

Bitch

And reckinize Mastafuu, GMFuu, or just plain ol Fuu
Is back for the break until I go back to schoo
Until then, just relax and chill out with me
You got the rubbers, I got the GHB
Let's find us a girl and we'll be the necros for the eve

Welcome to MastaFuu's archive, enjoy your stay
Except if you're Muslim, Korean, Furry, or Gay
There's the door, exit the same way, Good day!



Oh goddamn...that was quite possibly the worst freestyle ever.

Journal History